Wow, so I know I had posted intentions to get rolling on Dragon Hunter again, but life kind of has a way of smashing into my teeth like a well aimed brick. A month ago now, my boyfriend took a call from his sister, listened for a moment and gave a forlorn little wail of grief and burst into tears. Now call me crazy, but its never good when your man bursts into tears and can't speak. As it turns out, his mama had been in a fatal car accident a few days before and we were just finding out.

The last month has been one long nightmare. I wont bore you with all the dramatic weirdness that surrounded the accident at this point. Needless to say, writing has once again had to take a back seat while I rallied as much support around my love and his family as possible.

I learned so much from this, got to see with my own eyes the devotion and reverence these four siblings have in their hearts for their mama, the exhausting lengths they went to in order to bring her home and give her a ceremony full of light, flowers, laughter and of course tears.

It was an honor to be be allowed to help, to share tears and memories, those aching moments of combined sadness and appreciation for Mama Simone, to be able to hug and pour champagne in celebration and gratitude. So many emotions wound up and then stretched back out again.

Now comes the deep ache and quiet grieving that follows the hectic planning and accomplishing. Now is the breath in, and then out when hard reality comes knocking. Now is carrying on and being strong, stronger than even before, finding things to look forward to, a reason to smile. My poor love is devastated, his every thought is for his precious Mama. I just hope I am strong enough to carry through this, it is a challenge, because she has been elevated to angelic status in his eyes, and I have to deal with the fact that for the time being, he has very little emotional space for me. But I am willing, because I love him, his sister is one of my closest friends, and they are worth the effort.

Cheers to you, my Deviant family. I have been missing you all, and hoping your lives are filled with joy and art and love-all that sappy crud you know you'll hear from me. Now go hug someone you haven't hugged in a while, or write a letter to that person you've been meaning to get in touch with. Send flowers to your Mom--for no good reason other than to say, "Thanks for squeezing me out," or "Glad you didn't leave me out for the wolves." Go cuddle your kids and smooch the spouse, because there is truly no way to know when it will be too late to do it again. Love and Light from the bottom of my smutty heart.